This begins early when you arrive. Maybe even before you arrive. It begins with you being told, either by the shaykh & co directly or by murids, that murids are not trustworthy. It's something like, the murids come here because they are spiritually ill and immature, so you can't trust them. That is the excuse that they also give for all of the fitnah that used to come out of Ktown - oh it's the murids, they are't mature, they are spiritually ill.
But then at the same time, you're taught that the companionship of the "daraweesh" is the best company you can have, and that you should spend time with people who are serious about their suluk instead of non-Muslims or Muslims who are "caught up in the dunya." So, you're encouraged to stay away from Qasid students and other American Muslims who live in Jordan, you're encouraged to stay away from Jordanians, and you're encouraged to stay away from the other Americans who live and work in Jordan. Most of the people don't leave the neighborhood. They don't know Arabic, and they don't know anything about Jordan, so they're afraid to leave. So who do you have but the murids?
But why not trust them? They are Muslims, they are murids. Well the reason is that UK, US, and NK encourage you to tattle on other people. Most murids are immature and childish in many ways so if they see someone doing something that is against "As a Rule" or what they think isn't Islamic, they will go running to the z to tell on that person. So something that you might struggle with, is exposed before you want it to be. You know, even though he is your shaykh, I am sure that most people do not tell him everything. He really despises music and television, so I think the murids who are struggling to give that up don't tell him because he will kick them out of the tariqa. Or they fear he will.
But on a more real level, the reason you can't trust a murid in Ktown (or maybe in other towns) is that UK, US, and NK believe in sacred spying for the sake of the tariqa. US and NK believe that people will corrupt their tariqa. They keep a written profile of murids - I think it is all murids in the world, but especially of those who come to Jordan. Everyone must be in line with whatever NK and US are saying in this time, so if you wear clothing that doesn't conform or if you have TV in your house, things like this, they want to know about it. Since they never go out of their houses, they don't see the women in the street. They don't really know a lot of murids or know what is going on, so they rely on murids to be their eyes and ears into the world.
I remember with a few friends they would be amazed when Um Sahl would call them or Um Khayr would call them for a "talk" after the hadra or whatever. And they would say that they knew about something and they should get rid of it or stop doing it - whatever it was.
Just as an example, there was a woman who wasn't a murid who wasn't wearing niqab in the neighborhood. This was when there was no hard and fast rule about non-murids wearing it. In fact, none of the Qasid people who weren't murids wore it. So this woman wasn't a murid so she didn't wear it, but she came to the z. for all the hadras and stuff. So one day US told her, "I heard you aren't wearing niqab" in front of other people. How did she come to find this out, since she never leaves her house? Well, either murids ran and told on the non-murid or she had someone sacred spying on her.
Many of us, who have proven ourselves useful or single minded in the service of the shaykh somehow, have been called upon by the Um's to report on people. They will ask what you know about someone, and say, well, pay them a visit and tell me if you see anything strange. They have justified this saying, "We have the right to protect our neighborhood," because there is an attitude that they are Kharabsheh, they own Kharabsheh, even though most people in Kharabsheh want nothing to do with them. They believe it is their right to say who will live there, and where that person will live. So they want to make sure that people living there are following NK's rules, and if they aren't they will suggest they leave, or tell them to leave, or have the landlord kick them out.
So your friends, are they really your friends? US and UK admit that the "integrity" of their neighborhood - their ability to control the lives of the people who move there - is the motivation for their disobedience of the Quranic verses about spying.
But even if you can overlook that one, which a lot of us can and did for a long time, when UK forwards you an email from a murid, begging for her help, with the person's email address on it, or when NK passes around an email that one of his assistants has printed out with someone's darkest secrets in them, are these people worthy of trust? How about the people who receive them? When people get these emails or get passed a note from NK or they go to US's for tea and she fills their ears with stories about this or that murid who has displeased her, what do you think the murids' reaciton is?
They feel honored. They believe that this means they are now in the inner circle, that Besa and Hedaya now see them as equals of a sort, that they are progressed enough in their suluk to look down on the struggles of others. It makes people feel better about their problems to be able to look down on others' problems. Or perhaps they are afraid - if they raise questions about the propriety of this behavior, will they be next? Many people are afraid that some deep secret about them will be uncovered and they will be asked to leave the neighborhood.
No, but usually it is very pedestrian titillation. People love gossip and that's why you have a lot of gossip shows on TV and gossip magazines. This is no different, except that it has a veneer of piety on it. As if because they say they do it for the sake of the tariqa (not the sake of Allah or Islam, but for Nuh's tariqa) then that makes it okay. They said the murids are sick, and they're right in many cases, but they are sick too. Who else takes such perverse joy in passing around emails where a murid confesses that her marriage isn't consummated or that her husband is hitting her? Certainly not people who are worthy of any level of trust, much less with your heart, your soul, your akhira.
So rule #3. Trust no one, except Allah.
